The kid was obviously talented.\u00a0 He was athletic and graceful.\u00a0 He could sing, dance, memorize lines, and occasionally did a cartwheel across the room for fun.<\/p>\n
We were in an amateur show produced by a local community organization.\u00a0 Most cast members were adults.\u00a0 The kid held his own, did fine, brimmed with confidence.<\/p>\n
This kid is going to be a big success in life, I thought.<\/p>\n
A few weeks into rehearsals, his grandmother pulled me aside. He is biologically female, she told me.\u00a0 It was a lot to absorb, to say the least.<\/p>\n
The grandmother was not confiding in me because of any special relationship.\u00a0 She told me, I thought, because others already knew.\u00a0 It was not a secret.<\/p>\n
This child knew who he was from age three, the grandma explained.\u00a0 He had a girl\u2019s name and was treated like a girl.\u00a0 For his third birthday his family bought him a tutu.\u00a0 He refused to wear it and told them he was a boy, and that was that.<\/p>\n
This was the most accepting family a child could have hoped for.\u00a0 \u201cWe told him, \u2018We didn\u2019t know, we didn\u2019t understand,\u2019\u201d the grandma told me.\u00a0 They changed what had to be changed, including his name, and never tried to change his mind.<\/p>\n
He was not the first transgender person I\u2019ve met.\u00a0 I have been acquainted with a few others.\u00a0 The revelation has always been a shock.\u00a0 I\u2019ve had to compose myself, avoid asking inappropriate questions, and remind myself that this person has probably experienced a lifetime of obstacles and rejection and doesn\u2019t need any more tactlessness from me.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s a great relief that New Mexico has not turned the transgender bathroom issue into a political football as a few other states have.\u00a0 Good for us, New Mexico.<\/p>\n
The schools in Santa Fe and Albuquerque have adopted tolerant policies regarding use of restrooms and locker rooms by transgender students, allowing them to use whichever restroom fits with their chosen gender identity (though Albuquerque had a hubbub before the policy was adopted). \u00a0Most importantly, these school districts have taken a stand against bullying and discrimination against transgender students.<\/p>\n
The issue can be handled without a formal policy, as the Rio Rancho schools are doing, simply working with students case by case.\u00a0 This may be a useful model for smaller school districts that may encounter transgender students only rarely.<\/p>\n
Gender identity issues don\u2019t care about demographics. Looking at the stories of the Orlando shooting victims, I was reminded that gay people come from every kind of background and every ethnic group.\u00a0 The same is true for transgender.\u00a0 Wherever you live, the next gay or transgender child could show up in your neighborhood or your family.<\/p>\n
Most kids with gender identity issues are nowhere near as fortunate as the boy I described.\u00a0 A national study entitled \u201cInjustice at Every Turn\u201d found that most gender-nonconforming individuals have suffered lifelong discrimination and harassment, beginning in school.\u00a0 Most of them live in poverty because no one will employ them, and an astonishing 41 percent have attempted suicide.<\/p>\n
In Albuquerque, a shelter called Casa Q\u00a0 (www.casaq.org)<\/em> provides living options for teens with gender identity issues, some of whom were homeless because they were kicked out by their parents.<\/p>\n The very idea that a person can be not completely male or female but somewhere in between is troubling to many of us.\u00a0 It takes getting used to, and some folks will never accept it. Transgender people have probably been among us forever but hid their identity just as gay people did.\u00a0 Now they are out of the closet.<\/p>\n New Mexico has prided itself on being the land where many cultures live together in peace and harmony.\u00a0 Let\u2019s hope we can add this other set of cultural variations with a minimum of trauma.<\/p>\n Triple Spaced Again, \u00a9 New Mexico News Services 2016<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" The kid was obviously talented.\u00a0 He was athletic and graceful.\u00a0 He could sing, dance, memorize lines, and occasionally did a cartwheel across the room for fun. We were in an amateur show produced by a local community organization.\u00a0 Most cast … Continue reading